I have no idea why I'm so upset. But I am, and there's no help for it. I was sort of looking forward to doing sports this week, because I knew there'd be an article on ballroom, and I knew I'd be in it. Not only did I do my personal best, but, aside from the two very good women who dance Silver level with people from other schools, my partner and I had some of the best results at the Bronze level. No one else placed in Bronze Smooth, and the placements in Standard were for couples including the aforementioned higher-level dancers. But, no. The evidence suggests that I have been completely forgotten. Not only was I not listed in the entire article (although they did list nearly everyone else on the team, including the couple that placed sixth in a six couple event, and fun dance placements, and all twelve of our president's ribbons), but my placings weren't even counted in the total. (It doesn't take a genius to count that, of the twenty the author claims we won, and least 19 are listed in the article.) Now, I know this isn't exactly something important, but, darn it, it's just not fair. There are at least four dancers mentioned who don't even attend our college and will probably never read the stupid article. And I don't even feel right blaming one of the editors-in-chief, who is is coicidentally the vice president of the dance club, because she's so overworked it probably just slipped her mind. I'm used to not getting credit among classmates, because I don't feel the need to show off my knowledge or make them look stupid. (There have been times this week when I could have done that.) Typically, I could care less, and I have a fairly healthy self-esteem. As long as my professors know what I'm capable of, I'm content. But once in a while it's nice to get credit for something among one's peers. Dance is a special case because it's one thing that does not come naturally to me. I have to really work at it, and my confidence is fragile. I can't judge my ability because it seems to so darn difficult, and I'm just not used to that in other spheres. (I mean, I was never particularly good at traditional sports, but I never cared about sports.) When I do well, I'm really proud of my accomplishment. It's not like getting complimented on a paper I spend three hours on the morning before class. At this point, I figure I'm either worked up enough to actually talk during political science lunch (I generally prefer to listen, unless I have pressing questions), or so worn out that I'm going to sit there in a daze. I can hardly complain to Robbie about the paper in front of professors and random students... Writing always makes me feel better. :) ~Erin, 12:08 PM Comments: Post a Comment
